What do you fear?

Do you fear rejection or do you fear success? That’s a question most people don’t think about enough. Oftentimes, we don’t ask for what we want for fear of rejection. At least that’s how it appears on the surface. But if you look deeper, chances are the underlying issue could be fear of success. But why, why would someone fear success? Isn’t achieving success our ultimate goal in life?  We are programmed to work and be successful in relationships, hobbies, personal interests, keeping a clean house, staying organized, academics, business, etc. no matter the size of the coveted success. Success is that ultimate accomplishment in life that calls for celebration. I could go on and on about how we are taught from an early age the value of being successful but you get the point. Bottom line: sometimes we just aren’t ready for success of great proportions. This can be because of any number of reasons but I think that one of the main reasons is because of lack of understanding on how to handle success because there may be no real plan in place to move you and your business forward to carry success to the next level. That ponders the question: How much success is enough? Do you settle for a certain amount of success, or do you continue to strive for more? I believe that striving for success and accomplishing success is a constant evolving element in life, but ultimately, it depends on the person’s goals. Assuming he or she has definitive goals and knows which direction they are heading in, personally and professionally. Setting goals and making plans does not ensure success and success is not totally dependent on planning and goals. Moving success forward to something even bigger requires planning and goals.

Think about when you NEED to get something done and the task requires asking for help or input from others. Chances are you don’t give the fear of rejection a second thought when asking for what you need because you are so focused on getting done what needs to be done that you do whatever it takes to get it DONE. This mentality makes me consider the differences between wants and needs. When we need something, we get it. When we want something, eh, we may not pursue it with such determination, especially if it’s not an easily attainable want. So, is the fear of rejection based on wants? I would like to think that there is an element of fear attached to rejection when pursuing a want versus pursuing a need. When we are focused on needs, we focus on success and accomplishment, not rejection. You’re never going to get what you need on your own if you don’t make the pursuit a priority to succeed in getting what you need.  So, if you want success is it harder to get what you need to accomplish your goals? Just know that if you need success you are more likely to accomplish what you want in order to get what you need. Side note: if you don’t have a plan in place with set objectives to carry goals and success forward forget about celebrating anything long-term. Short-term, quick shot success will be about as far as you’ll get. Move on to a need and away from the want. Do we need success to validate ourselves? Not really. Success is in the eye of the beholder and one should not focus on what others’ consider to be success, but rather focus on moving forward in life, making a difference, and finding satisfaction in what he or she has achieved.  

A.D.D. Moment: This takes me to another psychological approach that many businesses use when working to accomplish sales goals, quotas, etc. (needs). There are some business motivators out there who will coach you to ‘go for the no’s’. Well, that’s great on the surface but if you look deeper that mentality can lead to settling for mediocrity or failure. You see, the problem with going for no’s and making it your main focus (especially in prospecting) is that we get satisfied with making a ton of calls and receiving a subsequent amount of no’s. I don’t know about you but isn’t it more important to NOT take the no’s personally and strive for the yes’s? Mediocrity is not something one should settle for in life, but maybe that’s just me. The mental strength to not take the no’s personally far outweighs striving to achieve the no’s when considering success in business, whether in prospecting, sales, or seeking help from others.  You can tell me NO all you want. I’m not responsible for your decisions. I’m responsible for a plan to move forward.  I’m responsible for my own success and failure, not yours. Considering this approach, I don’t fear rejection. I will only fear success if I don’t have a plan or goals with set objectives in place. How do plan on handling rejection and success? To be continued in evolutionary proportions…

~Cat~